Fun, Zenith

Amazon Reviewers Take On The Zentith Defy Xtreme Tourbillon

23 Comments 09 February 2012

So you’re in the market for a $90,000 titanium tourbillon? Where do you go? Amazon, of course!

This grey market Zenith Defy Xtreme Tourbillon is some pretty hot stuff, to be sure, but what to Amazon’s reviewers have to say about it? Instead of blither on and on about craftsmanship, they assume that this watch is a boondoggle (which it kind of is) and take the tongue-in-cheek route.

The description for this watch reads: “It’s said that one night after Jacot finished a movement he considered almost perfection he went out and looked at the stars and he felt the stars almost speak to him. ”

I will only buy watches from makers who eat lots of fiber, and I would recommend that you do so as well. The Zenith Xtreme Tourbillon is such a watch.

Trust me, I really want to give this watch 5 stars, but I find it terribly ironic that a device used to tell time has stolen so much of it from me. Ever since I purchased this watch, I am taking calls during work and at all hours of the night from women who now find me irresistibly attractive. I tried to go on a date with one of these women once, but she spent the entire evening staring at my wrist and making strange (yet slightly arousing) grunting noises.

I have more attention than I could ever hope for, but I feel so alone. At least I saved $58,000.01, though.

I bought this watch and then realized that there was one for sale on woot for $86,998.99. Don’t waste your money folks!

That’s the funny thing about high-end watches: unless you know what you’re looking for, they seem like snake oil. And who’s to say that they aren’t?

Author

- who has written 1033 posts on WristWatchReview.com.

I live in Brooklyn, NY and write about technology, security, gadgets, gear, wristwatches, and the Internet. After spending four years as an IT programmer, I switched gears and became a full-time journalist. My work has appeared in the New York Times, Laptop, PC Upgrade, Surge, Gizmodo, Men's Health, InSync, Linux Journal, Popular Science, Sync, The Stir and I've written a book called Black Hat: Misfits, Criminals, and Scammers in the Internet Age. I also speak and consult. I am currently East Coast Editor of TechCrunch.com and I run the BWL family of blogs, SlushPile.net and WristWatchReview.com. I also record the HourTime Podcast with Ariel Adams. This site is infrequently updated with my musings on technology but for goofy stuff you can visit biggs.cc and for most of my serious content head over to TechCrunch. You can check out my Amazon Author Page here. I'm @johnbiggs on Twitter. You can email me at john@biggs.cc or, if it's urgent, contact me here. Headshot by SharonaPhoto.com.

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